I am not a part of the “Sea Punk scene.” I’m not entirely convinced that such a thing exists. Up until recently I was pretty sure that Sea Punk was just a thing that Lindsey Weber made up one day.

I admit that there are people making pictures that borrow some visual aesthetics from the early 90s — poorly rendered 3D computer graphics, symbols like the yin yang, peace sign, and smiley face, dolphins and mermaids. Shit that you’d see on Pogs, Trapper Keepers, and anything Lisa Frank. So there are these people who call themselves web artists and profess to make Sea Punk art. And then when people like Rihanna and Azealia Banks use similar aesthetics in their productions, these so-called Sea Punk web artists get all mad about being ripped off.

I’m very much an outsider to whatever this Sea Punk thing is. I haven’t gone to any great effort to study Sea Punk or become familiar with any of the notable works within the scene. I think my memories of things from my own childhood are probably all I need. From where I sit, as far as I can tell, Sea Punk is all about a certain kind of cynical engagement anyway. So I’m fairly certain that I can create Sea Punk art without having any working understanding from inside the scene. What I want, more than anything, is for a serious Sea Punk artist to tell me what my art and/or my perception of Sea Punk is lacking.

Do you know Sea Punk? Tell me about how my appropriation of your scene makes you feel.

Remember when Montell Jordan performed “This is How We Do It” on All That?

Did he change the lyric from “I reach for my 40 and I turn it up” to “I reach for my Jordy and I turn it up”?

I get that when you’re performing for a bunch of 13 year olds, you can’t really mention alcohol. But what the hell is a Jordy? And why is there only one other person on the whole Internet asking this question?